Time to slow down...time to relax...time to sip tea...time to write...time to sit with my back against my bed...time to breathe... and my room's a mess and there's things to do...but I can't wait to take this time and do the most important thing right now: just be. let my mind wander and my thoughts take root. stretch out the limbs of my creativity and see a garden grow, and a painting appear out of nothing. the world says to obtain by doing, but could it be that in all this rushing and running that we can lose ourselves, lose sight of the essential things? what if we're running scared, away from something...Someone beckoning to us, reaching out ever so gently?
I want to learn what this life's all about - live in the moment, yet remember I'm standing on the brink of all eternity. I'm face to face with Him, yet my eyes are fixed on lesser things. speak, Lord, louder than my striving, my fears, my whirl of activity. hold me in breathless wonder because otherwise I'll be breathless chasing everything else.
I find myself wanting a kind of love that simply enhances my life. A love that adds more. More adventure, More security. More warm, fuzzy feelings, More satisfaction in life. More assurance that I am fiercely cherished and adored.
But in reality, Love is oging to come and disrupt my life. It will demand of me more than I realize. I can't remain the person I am today, with all my fear and pride, and love well. I will have to change and grow. I will have to give up my selfish ways. I will have to reliquish my kingdom that I've built while trying to create a safe, happy, little life for myself. My world is going to suddenly, and yet gradually, become a whole lot bigger and deeper.